Dear Facebook Friends,
I love you - I really do. I would not have accepted your friend request if we did not know one another in some capacity. I genuinely enjoy reading about your day, seeing your pictures, and watching you all try to one up each other to be the funniest facebooker.
Now here are some things that I would like to let you know about your status updates before you begin:
Yes - I know you are tired - really we are all tired - 'nuff said.
I think it is cute that you think that I am going to read your status update and suddenly say - "hey that was an amazing status update and I am going to go ahead and change political parties". Guess what folks - not going to happen.
The whole reason that I like to check Facebook is because I like to know what is going on in your life - keep me informed - love that. I don't even mind the mundane, "Bob is going to the store" status updates. I do, however, mind blasting your spouse and telling everyone how terrible he is and how hard your relationship is for all of your 237 Facebook Friends to read. Please don't do that - it makes me uncomfortable. Worse yet is talk bad about your kids, or someone elses kids or really just any kid in general. Yuk and Why?
Facebook drama - I actually check Facebook hoping for drama - love it - HIGHLY entertaining. I do not however want to participate in anyway in any kind of drama. Find someone else to traumatize.
Here is a little Facebook hint for you: Guess what? They changed the way that you update your status now so you can type in your entire story. There is no more need for this series of updates.......
Sally is sad.....
Sally's friend - ??????
Another of Sally's friends - What's wrong honey?
Another of Sally's friends - Hope you are having a great day. I love you!!!!!
Finally Sally - oh it is nothing guys - just some personal stuff going on
Sigh - news flash - don't put it on Facebook!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you so much my sweet Facebook friends,
Now I gotta go update my status!